Growing old...

Well this post is more of a ramble but I wanted to put my thoughts into words as if I let them swim around my own head I will be drowned with my own thoughts.

I started to read the book Water for Elephants as I want to see the movie eventually and I will never read a book after watching the movie, but will always see the movie if I have read the book. I was really interested in the plot as it was about a veterinarian who traveled with a circus. Now way back when I used to want to be a vet. I rode horses for years and spent many a nights on the farm watching foals be born or horses have colic and just was intrigued by a vets wits and willingness/stubbornness to find the answer. Now this dream was shattered with my barely 2.0 highschool GPA and the fact I wouldn't even be considered by NC State. Back to the point, the book seemed interesting and I needed a good vacation read. As I started the book I had a freak out moment as the book is set in the 30's and I really hate books set a long time ago as I can't visualize the scenes and characters so I get bored easily. I pushed through and just pictured the few movie clips that I had seen and let my imagination wonder. The author goes back and forth between the main character as he is now and his life in the circus. He is 90-93 or 20-23 depending on where you are in the book. I really like this and when he is 93 he spends time reflecting on getting old which got me thinking....

There are times that I close my eyes and let my mind wander to the years ahead when I am 93 and what life will be like. I am scared of the unknown but also have a sense of peace as to know my faith will carry me through. I still wonder if my faith is strong enough though...I know I just contradicted myself but I am trying to get my thoughts out. Having faith is believing right? So if you question your faith does that mean you don't believe? I promise I am going somewhere with this. Growing old is scary I wonder what will happen to civilization and how much will Satan succeed in his quest to conquer all. I think about the Earth and how as humans we seem to be on our way to complete destruction. I fear the future but don't dwell in that fear but at times when I am alone it floods my mind and I can't stop thinking about it. I am scared for what will become of this world we live in. If you go through this blog you will see this fear and wonderment comes around every few years and I still seem to wonder the same things. How does one have faith in something that seems so uncertain? Is the uncertainty the lack of knowledge? Am I uncertain because I am not a Christian? I consider myself a Christian but ask me what that means I would give the textbook answer of, he is my personal savior who died on the cross for my sins. What does that mean? I don't have that answer. I say I am a Christian because I believe in something bigger than me. Having Tillman reiterated the fact that in order for every single cell to come together perfectly to create this baby there had to be a bigger set of hands weaving the pieces together! This swims in my head all the time. I run from the thoughts mostly because it scares me. I run because I don't have the answers and maybe I am scared to find them. I run because I feel dumb when thinking them out loud. Many people know I can be very black or white in my thoughts and I tend to have an issue with the gray! (Totally googled how to spell gray because I struggle with it being either grey or gray. Here is what I found and now I will never forget! I love things like this. grAy is how it's spelled in America
grEy is how it's spelled in England. Such an ADD moment..sorry)

Wow my head hurts from thinking about all this! See what I mean about the thoughts flood my mind! To lighten to mood here are some pictures of Tillman on our way to dinner! Man do I love this little guy!

Family Vacation 2011

Well we are this year we are enjoying our first family vacation as a family of three! Last year we went to KY for a reunion which could be considered our first, but this year seems to be more real since is so much more interactive and we are doing more vacation type things!

Our week started off rough because Tillman got car sick on the way to Charlotte and threw up all over the car! So the car stunk and we had to drive 12 hours to Orlando. Well with cleaning and Fabreeze we were able to get the stink out and start our trip.

The drive down was great nothing but easy sailing a few stops for food and leg breaks and we made it just in time for dinner!

Our first day we spent food shopping and some pool time. He loves the water! I was so worried he would be scared or just not like it! He loved splashing and squirting water on everyone I mean everyone even strangers! He loved to walk in and out of the water which was so cute to watch with his water shoes on! I drank fruity drinks and watched Grandma play in the water with him!

I also ran four miles because Tillman decided to wake up way to early! I figured I better make the best of the time and try to keep all the food I was going to consume go straight to my butt! We also got pedicures and I had her put a little flower on my big toes and man does it make this vacation feel a little bit sweeter!

The second day we had to go back to the food store and Target to get some supplies and then spent the rest of the day at the pool! Where again fruity drinks were my companion! :)

The third day we went to a different pool and Tillman went down a water slide with Matt. Matt is such an insurance guy and he would not go down the slide because it said one rider at a time and he wanted to go with Tillman. The height rule was also taller than Tillman. Well then we saw a lady go down with her daughter who was shorter than Tillman which made Matt think...hmmm maybe we can go down. Finally with enough badgering from me, he took him down and Tillman loved it! I took a couple videos and the first time Matt stopped halfway down because didn't want to go to fast and so he had to scoot the rest of the way! Oh the memories!

Then that night we went to Outback for dinner and I ate a 12 ounce steak! Man was I glad I ran another four miles that morning! Hopefully I will get home and not have gained a pound!

Today I am excited because we are on our way to Universal Studios! Matt wanted to take Tillman to Magic Kingdom but I convinced him that was way to much to spend on a two year old that won't remember it! So he suggested we go to the park just the two of us! I liked that idea way better! We haven't seen the new Harry Potter section so I am excited to see something new! We love rides and hopefully we get our monies worth today! Grandma and Pop will be watching TMan for the day! So happy we don't have to pay a babysitter!

Well I am off to enjoy the rest of my vacation which is only two more days....makes me sad just thinking about it!

Sing You Home by Jodi Picoult

Well since we are leaving in a week for vacation I bought a couple new books. I was so excited about them that I started to read one. Sing Me Home by Jodi Picoult is by far one of her BEST books! I haven't finished it and I really am only half way through but man is it good!

I want to write about what the story is about but I am scared to give away all the good details! What I love most about Jodi is how she tells the story through the different characters! I think I have become a snob when it comes to reading books because her style. If I get confused in a book I tend to put it down. Her style makes it easy to relate to each character but she also pushes the envelope when it comes to who you take a side with! Since each character has their own story and she tells their story each time you begin to relate to each one.

This is what she wrote "In the aftermath of of a series of personal tragedies, Zoe throws herself into her career as a music therapist. When an unexpected friendship slowly blossoms into love, she makes plans for a new life, but to her shock and inevitable rages, some people-even those she loves and trusts the most-don't want that to happen." This synopsus doesn't do the story justice! Man she really gets you pulled in with her provocative story lines and really makes you think. She also takes many twists and turns!

You have to go out and get this book! It really is amazing!

Run Elizabeth Run!

Totally corny title but that is how I have felt the past month! I have started to run....ok ok I would say more or less jog these days! I hate running! I really hate running but I love to set goals and meet them! Running is a quick way for me to set a goal and work towards it! I also like the affect it is having on my weight loss plan!

These are all good reasons but the best reason is that I have two great running partners that motivate me and encourage me! Having someone run with you and tell you how great your doing really makes a difference. It also helps to have someone who runs so much better than you because it motivates you!

I bought a pair of new running shoes to help me be motivated but also help with making it easier. :)


I bought a new pair of running pants and a running shirt. I was totally one who thought spending money on that was a waste but man do they really help with the sweat and the keeping me cool.


I also downloaded an app on my phone to track my runs and to tell me my speed and elevation. I am so darn competitive that I keeping track makes me push myself a little more.

I can't believe I am saying this but I am looking for award to each time I run now which is so odd since I hate running! :)

Busy Busy Busy

Well all I can say is life is crazy busy! Being a family of three has really sucked up all that down time we had two years ago! This is a good thin in many aspects but in others it can be overwhelming!

Well we have been busy since January! First I made a resolution to get healthy! I know you snickered just then! If you go back in the archives weight has always been a topic but I needed to get serious in January! I have really worked hard the past couple months and I feel great! I have kept off consistently 8 pounds! I am 142 solidly and have been that for a few weeks. I have started to run which is exciting because I hate running! :) I hate running but I am super competative so I set these mini goals for me and when I meet them I am on a high! It is great! The running is starting to get my fat under control. Two times a week I take a weight lifting class which has really strengthened my arms and legs. I can actually do ten pushups!! So needless today this resolution is still going strong!

Something else that is pretty exciting is that I was accepted into NC State University for their graduate program in administration! I am really excite but totally scared out of my mind. There are nights where I have a panic moment and think what have I done! I applied to a distance learning program so I am still waiting to hear about my acceptance there! Keep your fingers crossed!

School is great I love second grade and my kids are amazing! I have really enjoy a new curriculum and challenges that brings! I am excited to start a new year with having this year under my belt! Next year will be so much better since I will know everything about second grade!

Now to the main show! Tillman is great! He amazes me so much these days! He is so verbal and knows so many words! He loves to eat and play with balls and cars! He knows most animal sounds. He knows the letter B and R. He loves to sit with his "TapTop" laptop in his lap while we have ours in our laps. He LOVES "Ella" Stella to pieces but we have to watch ourselves because he mimics everything we do. When we yell at her he yells too! He is 28 pounds of all boy but can be such a drama king! He loves to be "utside" outside watching the big boys play basket ball then we will walk to the park and go down the "ide" slide! He has learned the word help which is nice since he doesn't whine as much when he wants something. He says ouch for anything he doesn't like you doing to him such as changing his diaper or picking him up to bring him inside. We are working on our letters and colors which he has the attention span of a fly so that is fun!

We are busy busy busy but loving every moment of it!