Fall!!!

So this weekend marks the weekend that fall rolls in!! I love this weather. I want to create a place where this weather stays forever!! I love being able to wear pants with a shirt and still feel cool. I love the way it smells when going outside. I love the gitty feeling you get when your walking outside.

I hate the cold and flue that comes with this weather. I am fighting it right now and I know it was my fault. I told a friend that I never get sick.....sure enough here it came!! FULL FORCE!!

Well things are still the same. Except we found out Friday that as of December 10th if the house doesn't sell then the company can't move us. Well they can but then it would become taxable income and that is 20,000 dollars that would be added to our income to be taxed which means that we would have to pay in an ass load of money...so needless to say I am upset. This is the reason I wanted to move...they were going to move us!!! Perfessional movers!! Oh please dear lord help us....evertime we turn around it is somethign else that gets taken away!!

I really and frusterated with life right now. I am in love with my kids this year but I am so stressed and frusterated with this move and the future I really can't enjoy what is going on. I want a hint or something to know what will happen to us in a few months. I don't know what to do.....Matt and I are fine but it is hard and gets harder each month!! This whole thing SUCKS!!! I don't know what will happen and if the house doesn't sell then we are back where we started. I just want him to get another job and stay here! Why is that so darn hard....why can't he get another job here? It makes me sick to my stomach to think about the next few months. I hate this feeling. Why can't we just move already or stay already. They took away his gas mileage, they took away his fridays, they took away the moving. What else can we take? I hate this so much......

Nothing else is going on. I am so ready for Christmas time because we get to go see the family. I remember being 16 and I would always wish for another year to pass by because I wanted to see what was next and what was going to happen. When I got married I was so excited and content with us in the now I hadn't had one of those thoughts till now. I wish now it would be a year from now so we can see what happens. I really hate wishing time away, but I am not sure what is harder....sitting her wondering or missing a year. I really wish I was more of a prayer warrior because I know that is why I am not at peace. My friend Stephanie was my biggest prayer warrior in colleg. She was always praying and I felt it. She was there for me and could always talk to her and tell her things that I couldn't tell other people. I haven't seen her in years and I miss her dearly. It is odd to look back only a few years and see where you are and who is with you. I really do miss her dearly.

Well I am off to take some medicine and go to bed. I have been in bed all day and I am planning on staying here till tomorrow!!