Sickness Sickness Go Away, DON'T come back another day!

Well the past week we have been fighting some kind of cold bug! Last Friday Tillman had a fever and we took him to the docs and got medicine. My mom came up to visit for the weekend and took care of Tillman because I caught whatever the little guy had. The doctor gave us antibiotics and an inhaler which helped the cough. He was not a happy guy with having to take it! The antibiotics weren't working so we had to go back and get a stronger one. The poor thing is just now feeling better! The picture shows him playing with the inhaler spacer. I wanted him to see it more as something that doesn't always make him mad. It worked because after he played with it for awhile he took the treatments much better!

One Proud Momma

So being a mom has really changed my perspective on life! I try not to take the little things for granted anymore. I try to be a better loving person in order to be a good role model to my son ;) (Still working on this one) There are moments as a momma the past nine months that have melted my heart. When Tillman was born I can't explain the feeling or the overwhelming love that I felt for this little guy.

but..yesterday was one of those moments where I clapped and teared up because Tillman learned how to drink out of a straw!! ok ok I know what a big deal NOT..but I had been teaching him for days how to do it on his own. He wanted so badly to do it but could get enough suction to pull the water up. Then yesterday the water bottle was on his highschair, he grabbed it and sucked away! I was overjoyed!! It was such a proud moment. Typing this and looking back, it doesn't seem like such a big deal, but man was it!! It was the first thing that I had taught him how to do!! Now the boy can't get enough water!! All he wants to do is drink from his sippy cup!! His grandparents were here to witness and we all clapped and Tillman thought we were some weirdos!!

Look at me so proud!!

Just drinking away!!

Why are taking so many pictures mom!!

Exorcist..I mean a boy with personality! ;)

As Tillman grows and gets older his personality is coming out full force! He is one lovable inquisitive child. He is also a want what I want RIGHT NOW type of kid. Now that he understands that when we take something he won't get it back most likely he is beginning to show us that he is one uphappy little guy. His tantrums erupt like the exorcist movie. Head throw back, arms go out, mouth wide open, back arched and all the while a scream as if we are ripping a limb off is being bellowed at the top of his lungs. Then when he gets whatever he wanted such as being held or a toy that fell, head comes forward, back becomes straight, arms come in for a clap, eyes grin, and he gets the biggest smile with a little snicker as if to say "GOTCHA"!!! There are also times where if our attention isn't 100% on him, he will also let us know. The best part is that you can totally tell the difference because there are no tears and it shuts off just as fast as it came on. The pictures were taken in order of a time when I was in the kitchen washing bottles and he wanted me to come play. It was hilarious!

Trying to get moms attention.(do you notice that he really isn't crying)

I come sit with him and he smiles!

I started to get up to go back to the kitchen.

I sit back down to show his ability to turn it off!

I really had to go wash dishes so he would have a bottle for dinner!!

Boy do I love this little guy and does he not have us wrapped around his little finger!!

Wordless Wednesday

Date Night with the Hubby

So as I blogged stalked today I stumbled upon a blog that is doing something called "Project 52" which is her plan to have 52 dates with her husband from now till the end of the year! I was so intrigued because I always say things to Matt like...you never spend time with me...we don't hang out anymore...We don't laugh anymore...ok so that sounds a little dramatic but in reality Matt and I don't really "hang" out anymore unless we are on a mission which involves a task that isn't about us. I always said to Matt that I want us to make an effort to stay in love. I want us to show our children what a healthy marriage looks like and show them all the time that we love each other. I come from divorced parents which means I want to do things differently then they did.

Anyway back to the gist of things here...while stalking this blog and reading about their dates, I saw a guest blogger that said she set up folders for the month and at the beginning of the month they open them together and set the dates. Inside the folder is gift cards, or tickets or already planned dates and all they have to set the date! I thought this was the coolest thing ever!!

My goal for the rest of spring break is to create April to May of next year folders for each month. I am going to set up two dates for the month have them planned and ready to go! I think this will ease Matt's mind because he hates spending money, but this way he doesn't need to spend money for the month. I think I might even coordinate grandparents to come up so we can go out without finding a babysitter!

I am really really excited about this! Divorce is such a ramped thing these days and I know life gets crazy but I think it is so special to spend time to date your husband. I am really going to give this a huge effort and see how it goes. The guest blogger said she loves getting dressed up and hearing her children comment on her clothes and how their parents look so happy. I want that for my children and I feel this way we can take the stress out of "planning" dates because of the necessity of them. They will already be planned and all we have to do is show up!!

**I need idea for cheap fun dates!! Leave a comment and share with me what you think would be a fun date!

Comparing apples to oranges...

So as a mom you always hear "don't compare children...they all grow so differently.." Through pregnancy I kept reminding myself of that because people always said that about pregnancy. Now that Tillman is nine months old, I have to constantly remind myself of that. When I look at him and compare him to other babies born the same time or even a few months later, he is definitely taking his sweet time to become mobile. He is perfectly content on sitting and not moving. Nothing entices him to try to move, NOT EVEN FOOD!! Needless to say I an enjoying this non mobile time because I can plop him on the floor and not worry he is getting into something. I don't think it means anything developmentally but it is hard to not compare or ask why. I know that as he grows and being a teacher I am going to have high expectations for Tillman. I am going to work hard to teach him all about the world around him. I just hope that I can keep my comparing in check. Tillman is perfect in my eyes! He is the happiest most fun loving laid back child that a mom could ask for! He has become such a little man and as a mom I am so proud of all the milestones he has met. Crawling will come as walking will come but I need to sit and enjoy this time. (Someone remind me of this post when I am pulling my hair out with a crawler going all over the place!)

Best Daddy in the WHOLE world!

Well I have always known I married an amazing man. There are plenty of times where don't remember how amazing but I am one lucky gal. When Tillman was born he stepped up and took care of me and him while working. Matt never took a day off of work after Tillman was born. Through this past nine months he has changed diapers, cleaned snot and spit up, helped me through recovery, while still being a great husband. He loves to play with Tillman and be the fun dad. He also will clean the house, wash dishes and do laundry! I love him so much and watching the man you love play and laugh with your son, melts our heart! You can see from the picture that even with drool about to hit his head he still does whatever to make Tillman laugh!

Getting so big!

So as we approach the nine month mark I begin to get a little sad. My little man is starting to change so much each day and he is becoming more and more independent. The other day he took his first "crawl" but then he realized he was on his hands and knees and SPLAT he face plants back to the floor. Tillman has always been on the heavy side of the scale so crawling is going to take a lot of cordination for him. He is really trying but would rather stand than be on his stomach. The other day I was putting him on the couch and he didn't want to sit. He refused to bend his knees. I am so sad that he is changing so much and is really becoming a little man! I LOVE HIM SO MUCH!!!

Hey what, I am trying to relax over here!

This is my James Dean pose!

Chomp Chomp Chomp

Well any mother will tell you teething is a pain! The poor little ones go through so much just to get those first little chompers. Tillman has found the teeth he has and grinds them like it is going out of style!! I tried to get some pictures and he became an unhappyer camper!

What has this world come to?

Ok so I just left the park with Tman and the Lovelace's. We had a great time in the sun watching all the kids play. Tman swung in his first swing which he loved. As we were leaving, now I do have to say the park was MAD CRAZY BUSY, there were hundreds of people, I was pushing the stroller up the hill. As we reached the top, I had to make a decision as to where I would push the stroller because the top of the hill where the exit was, had people standing in the way. I made the decision to go towards the right where this woman and her stroller were standing. She wasn't in the middle of the exit but she wasn't to the side either. There were people come down this hill as well so I was trying to dodge everyone. Well when I pushed through the gap I got really close to this woman who was standing to the side of her stoller doing something with her kid. Her butt was hanging out in the hole where I was going through. As I walked by, she said "Damn woman!" I politly said sorry not knowing what I had done. As I kept walking I thought, how rude. If it was the other way around I wouldn't have said anything know that this place was packed and that I was in the way! It really makes my heart hurt when I hear and see things like this because I think about the world that Tillman will grow up in. I want to shield him from all this. I want him to see the positive before the negative. I want him to give people the benfit of the doubt. I want him to have a heart that he shares with people. It makes me sad when parents at my school sometimes attack teachers. I know that most times they are trying to save face but it really breaks my heart. I hope that through my actions and through my parenting I can teach Tillman that not all people are like this.....geesh!!!

First Birthday Party

So as the time flies by I am begining to organize my thoughts for Tillmans first birthday! I am really interested in doing a party that is more for the parents than the kids but also incorperates some fun kid aspects. For example, I thought of the idea "We survived the first year!" and having a survivor theme. For the little kids they would get fun little survivor goodie bags while the adults get fun little adult drinks!! I wanted something that adults would enjoy but also a place where parents could bring their kiddies to as well. We will be having it at the house on June 19th which is the Saturday. I want family and friends to be there! Tillman won't know the different hence why I want to do a play on a kiddie theme! So if you have any ideas I would greatly appreciate them. I am really into childrens books so I was trying to think of one that could lend to a theme for both kids and adults! So please let your creative juices flow and lend me some ideas!

8 months

Well Tillman is eight months old! He is becoming such a little man! I love him more each day and it breaks my heart when I see little infants and think about how big he has gotten. Here are some stats.

He weighs 25 pounds
Wearing 12 month clothes
size 5 diapers
size 4 in baby shoes and he even needs a little bigger if he wears socks
loves to eat those puff things
says dada ALL THE TIME
Drinks out of a sippy cup
loves all veggies and tons of fruit
wants to crawl but is content on sitting instead of being on his tummy
sleeps through the night
will wake up in the morning and talk to himself for thirty minutes
is starting to let people hold him
loves to do new things and gets bored easily
has four teeth

That is all I can think about right now. I am starting to think about his first year birthday party. New post ahead!! Enjoy the picture!

What really matters...

Now that Tillman is here and I have had eight amazing months with him, I really started to think about what really matters. We went to Charlotte a few weeks ago and it wasn't the best trip ever. Now that we are parents and have very busy lives, leaving the comfort of our home is hard. It is even harder with a baby because you have to pack everything up. We went home and when we got back to Raleigh we were exhausted! When we go down there we feel we have to meet with everyone and hang out equally because we don't get to see everyone often. After this trip Matt and I really talked a lot about trips now and how our lives have changed. We can't go down as often as we would like. Then I called my mo and she gave me some insight as a grandma. She said that there is not feeling like it. It made me think about the inconveince going to Charlotte puts on us and how important Tillman is to our family. It made me think that if any part of our family were change in any way, I would regret not getting out of my comfort zone to see them. Being a parent changes everything because you no longer have an equation of two. The third part of the equation matters the most! Once my boards are done and life is less crazy I think going to Charlotte will be a lot easier.

5 little secrets...

Here are 5 little secrets you may not know about me...beware...it may change your oppinion of me :)

1. I am super morbid in my own head. Many times a day I have morbid thoughts of "what ifs"...for example I think about...What if I was shot in the head, how would people react...or my favorite is when I take a shower I go through a dramtic scene in my head where someone breaks into the house and shoots me while in the shower, I would play dead till they left and crawl out to my cell phone and call the police. I literally place this scene in my head EVERY time I get into the shower..somedays with variations...I guess this stems from my need to be prepared....sick I know!

2. I get really nervous thinking about getting in trouble. For example, when I go into stores I purposlfully empty my purse in the car except my wallat because I have this fear that if I had something in my purse like chapstick or a pen that you could by from the story someone might think I am shoplifting. I am not sure where this one comes from, but at least my arm doesn't hurt when I am walking around shopping.

3. I constanlty worry about people judging me and talking about me. I try to act confident but when I am left out or think I walked into a conversation that was about me...I get really quiet and sad. I am really insecure inside and sometimes it is hard for me to belive someone if they say they weren't talking about me. I have always had trouble being confident...I also don't take compliments well.

4. I love to travel but flying makes me sweat gallons (since I already sweat a lot...gallons is WAY a lot)...when I fly I have to drink or take something...but I always love the destinations!

5. I am sad that Matt and I don't have a church to baptise Tillman in. I don't think Matt knows how important this is for me because for him and his family, baptising isn't looked upon the same way. I really wish that we could get Tillman baptised.

Well now that you know little dirty secrets about me...how about you!

Num Nums

Before I became a mom I always thought I would never be one of those moms....you know the ones that have cute little names for things such a pee pee for you know what. I was dead set on calling things by their proper names. I never wanted Tilley to grow up not understanding the world around him. Well when Tillman was born all those "before I had a baby" thoughts starte to surface. Started making cute little noises to him and calling things cute little names. It is amazing how when you look at a little one you just automatically start calling things by weird names. Well one of those instances is with food. Now that Tilley is easting TONS of food, it is often that I tell him that we are going to go eat. Instead of teaching my son the proper name like breakfast, lunch, dinner or snack...I call it num nums....my poor son is going to have a complex....see for yourself!

You know your a mom when...

It is funny how many times I week I think about this post....I always try and remember all the funny odd things I do as a mother and then when I get time to sit and type my brain disappears..Here are a few that I could remember!! Please chime in on my comments if you can add anything!

You know your a mom when in order for you to get your daily dose of veggies, you give the baby a spoonful...then yourself a spoonful...then the baby a spoobful...by the end of the dinner feeding you both have had your daily dose of veggies

You know your a mom when you shave your legs and there looks like a chiuaha was just shaved in the bottom of your shower....oh wait when do I have time to shave!!

You know your a mom when you purposfully keep a scarf in all cars because you know at some point in your day snot or spit up will end up on the shoulder of your shirt....a scarf does the trick

You know your a mom when your out in public and you hear a baby cry and you start running though the rolledex in your brain of all the things it could possibly be...then you bend over and realize your sweet baby is asleep

You know your a mom when in moments of thought you break out into wheels on the bus to help clear your mind....

You know your a mom when you open a diaper and say YES after a long night of constipation!!!

You know your a mom when you stick your pinkie finger up a babies nose and then inspect your find to ensure no one is gettig sick without even blinking an eye!

You know your a mom when you start playing rock paper scissors to see who will get up at 3 am when the baby is teething...it really is the only FAIR way

Even though some of these are dumb they are all true...so please if your a mom add yours!! I know there are a million more, but as a watch my sweet boy eat his puffs all I can think about is how amazing this job is!!

2010 Snow Day

Well NC finally got the big snow they have been calling for! It stared Friday evening and snowed all night. It was fluffy and pretty. Then Saturday it all froze and now we have a four inch sheet of snowice! It stinks because we will be out of school on Monday which means we lose a workday, and then Tuesday isn't looking so hot either which means we would add a day to the end of the year which in my mind is STUPID...who is going to teach on that day...uggghh....ohwell

We took Tillman out in his double layered snow suit and bear gloves. He wasn't sure what to make of it. Since it was sleeting a little he was grumpy so it was a short two minutes outside but we got many cute pictures!!!

I'm such a bad mom...

Well if you scroll down you can see that it has been awhile since I posted. I really had all great intentions of keeping this up when school started. With Matt being gone the first few months it was hard to do anything but be Tilley's mom so many things such as my eyebrows, leg hair, dishes and this blog went the way side. Now that I really am sad about it I am going to do something about it. My hope is to go back through my pictures and post about the things that have happened in the past four months. I am going to try and date the post as close as I can so they will go in order so make sure to scroll down to see all the posts.

Well Tillman is seen months old as of the 20th of January. He amazes Matt and I each and every day. Here are some highlights of six/seven months:

*He is probably weighing close to 23 pounds now and 27 inches long
*He eats six-eight ounce bottles when he has a bottle
*He eats two fuits and two veggies a day
*He is sleeping through the night...8:15-8:00
*He loves loves loves Stella...when she walks by him he laughs the deepest barrel laugh possible
*He loves Miss Lana...when she opens the door he smiles so big and starts to talk to her
*He is so inquisitive now, he will arch his head around to look at something or lean all the way back and turn his head if he heas a noise
*He does not like being on his belly...I think we will have a late crawler...
*He only wants to stand and if you sit him down he will arch his back and throw his legs straight as boards and grunt till you stand him
*He has one tooth and one coming it right beside it
*He loves bath time!!!
*He is incredible tickelish...he inner thighs are the best place to squeeze and he will laugh so hard
*He makes Matt and I smile each and everyday!!!

Now for some pictures!!

Tilley the Tiger

Tillman's first halloween was GREAT! He was a tiger which he looked darn cute in!! We spent time with the Lovelace's at their halloween party!! Tillman rocked the playpen out while we hung around with all the ghostly characters!! I can't wait for next year to see what Tillman will be!!

I'm getting old!!

Well October 10th marked a wonderful occasion! My little brother married his beautiful fiance Kath. It was a beach wedding which was so nice! Kath is an amazing addtion to our family, and my brother better take care of her!

The wedding was at Kill Devil Hills, and everything was amazing. They rented a HUGE house for the wedding party and it was a four day party!! I drove with my dad and Jenny since Matt was still in VA. He met us there and the party began. Friday night was the rehersal dinner which was wonderful!! It even had a chocalate fountain. Saturday it began to rain half way through the ceramony but then the clouds parted afterwards and we went on the beach for pictures. Kath was stunning and James never looked better. I have never seen such a genuine smile on my brothers face until I saw him watch Kath walk down the isle!! Tillman loved watching his Uncle James and Aunt Kath finally say I DO!!!